Leaving Behind Toxic Relationships
This week I have a VERY special podcast episode to share with you.
A few months ago I did a podcast with a fellow therapist Lourdes Viado on leaving behind toxic relationships. Particularly those relationships you may feel guilty about leaving behind.
The podcast ended up being one of her top 10 and she invited me back to talk about the subject of my upcoming book Everyday Codependency.
Everyday Codependency is the idea that many people who have had toxicity and trauma in the past try to leverage enough love in their lives either through helping other people or controlling other people.
This is what it looks like:
You grew up (or had a foundational relationship) with someone who “invalidated” your emotions.
“Don’t cry. You’re stressing out your mother”
“You can’t be hungry, you just ate”
“Why are you such a drama queen”
You picked up that you just shouldn’t be a “bother” and needed to be a “good girl” and not make waves.
This made it so that you felt that you couldn’t trust your emotional experience and you couldn’t ever really be yourself. You had to “behave” how people wanted you to behave in order to be loved. And so you started to feel you had to earn love.
So you started to do whatever you could to make that happen.
And often times this looked like you overhelping, or doing whatever you felt you “should” to make other people happy.
It’s a Coping Mechanism
The good news? This is a coping mechanism that can be changed (unlike the old tired codependency theories that conceptualize this as something that happens with an alcoholic partner).
This means that you are fundamentally EMPOWERED to change your entire life and feel a sense of happiness, worthiness, and contentment in the here and now.
Not once you’ve earned it.
Not once you’ve been given permission.
Not once other people are happy.
But right the eff now.
Doesn’t that sound amazing?
So be sure to check out the podcast to dive into this groundbreaking topic and determine how to start making changes in your own life.
Your True Self Can Be Free, Content, and Confident
Did you know that I specialize in helping women who have had a narcissistic, hypercritical, or judgmental person in their past that made them feel they had to earn love?
To feel like they are entitled to their dreams and desires.
To feel empowered to feel all of their emotions, to ask for their needs to be met, and to be who they truly are.
And to drop all of the guilt and shame that they’ve learned to cope with because of this “toxic cycle”.
And right now I’ve just opened up a couple of spots for new coaching clients like you to help you evolve into your truest self.
Your true self is free, content, confident, and no longer tiptoeing on eggshells around everyone else.
If this is you I want to invite you to a free 30-minute insight session with me.
In it, we’ll talk about the patterns that have been holding you back from living a life of truth, self-expression, and happiness.
One of my clients said that the first 20 minutes she spent working with me made a bigger impact than 20 years of therapy.
Grab your spot now!
Anxiety. Fear. Playing Small. Stuckness.
You’re living in a prison of your own making.
It’s time to change that forever.