Bitch Mode Boundaries
Most people hear “boundaries” and they think they have to erect a brick wall that says “STOP”! That they have to go into bitch mode and slap some sense into some people.
But the most effective boundaries don’t work like that.
Boundaries can be kind, inviting, and actually nurture relationships.
Boundaries aren’t about pushing other people back.
They’re not about adopting a “this way or the highway!”
They’re not about coming at people from a place of anger or feeling disrespected.
(In fact, if you’re at that point, you haven’t set your boundaries soon enough).
Setting Boundaries People Want to Follow
Successful boundaries are about expressing your needs and your standards in a way that other people can hear and understand and want to fulfill.
They’re about helping people understand what would make you happy, and how they can give that to you.
It’s about making it clear that by respecting your boundaries, they win too.
Successful boundaries make it easy and fun for people to want to give you what you want.
Don’t Fear Boundaries
Because no one responds well to being bossed around.
No one likes feeling criticized.
People get defensive when they’re approached from a place of anger.
Everyone rebels against orders.
No one wants to hear that harsh critical voice barking out “do this! Not that!”.
And yet, for most women I work with, that’s what they feel that boundaries are.
“I don’t want to set boundaries, or I won’t be able to stay committed to being loving and caring!”
“I don’t want to set boundaries or I’ll be an asshole!”
“I don’t want to set boundaries or I’ll be abandoning people!”
No wonder you feel like ambivalent about setting boundaries!
Boundaries Are About Love
Boundaries aren’t about abandoning others.
They’re not about being harsh and uncaring.
And they’re most definitely not going to go over well if you’re an asshole about it (lol).
There are ways to set boundaries where it feels good for EVERYONE involved.
Boundaries allow for more intimacy.
Boundaries allow for more vulnerability.
Boundaries actually allow you to be more loving!
Because setting boundaries can be a win-win for everyone.
And when it’s a win-win it’s much easier for EVERYONE to get what they really want.
Now doesn’t that sound fun?
Want more info on how to set boundaries that people actually want to follow? Grab my free ebook bel In it you’ll find a special bonus workshop on setting boundaries that allow you to be MORE loving in your life!
Transform your life from an “I guess” to a “Hell Yes!” with this free ebook
It’s time to release the Toxicity & Trauma that’s been keeping you stuck for good.